I am feeling fine. I am a little lacking in energy but
all-in-all I am ok.
There is no way I could do an epic shop or spend the night
dancing. Chilling out at home is really the only thing I fancy doing to be
honest but that is fine because that is precisely what I am doing.
I have to say, I felt much worse yesterday and didn’t hold
out a great deal of hope for today when I went to bed last night. But the power
of sleep never ceases to amaze me and today has been a whole different ball
game.
And I reached a momentous decision this morning - I am
pleased to let you know that I am now OUT OF THE MS CLOSET (or cupboard as I
prefer to call them!)
Yep, this morning, I decided it was time to stop being such
a wimp about having MS. Yes it is rubbish, but as was proved to me by some of
the fellow patients of the hospital ward I was in last week, it could be a lot
worse.
I’ve just had a really up-to-date drug to try and force my MS
into hibernation, I don’t have any permanent symptoms to speak of and quite
frankly, I’m as lucky as I can be with a diagnoses like this.
And so I finally got the courage to ring around various
family members to let them know – and their reaction was pretty refreshing. Yes
it is rubbish, but I’ve got it and now it’s time to get on with it. And despite
my reluctance to land this enormous weight on them, my fears that they wouldn’t
cope were completely unfounded and I feel cross with myself for under-estimating
them. Funnily enough, I feel like a huge weight has been lifted in that I no
longer have to try and hide something from them and I can just be me again.
There is one thing that’s changed in me, probably for the
worse, and that is my empathy towards other people whose problems seem tiny and
insignificant now. I just can’t stand listening to the moaning and whining of
people who are fed up in their job or have fallen out with their husband or
have a nightmare boss or are getting over a break up of a short love affair.
Don’t get me wrong, I hate seeing them sad and fed up but at the same time, I
want to give them a quick hug and then turn them around and give them a size
six kick up the bum and tell them to get on with it! Life is too short to be
messing about. But then I guess that as someone who has just come to terms with
being told they have MS, I would be saying that and as time goes on, I too will
start moaning about the mundane again. That’s being human for you!
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