My old friend MS has decided that after the miracle of the baby sleeping straight through for the last six nights that I have got too used to feeling raring to go on waking and that it is definitely time for it to remind me that it is boss and the best way to do that would be to give me a delicious dose of fatigue. Brilliant.
Now I know many with MS already know exactly how I feel but for those lucky enough not to realise what fatigue is, let me explain.
- I don't feel tired - I feel absolutely and utterly exhausted.
- I don't feel a bit weary - I feel like I've been trekking a mountain for the last three days. Without a break.
- I don't feel like I need to put my feet up - I feel like my legs will collapse under me if I stand.
- I don't feel like I can't be bothered today - I feel like if I did, I would die.
- I don't feel like I've had a late night with a bottle of wine - I feel like I was beaten around the head with the bottle and then kicked in the face and forced to stay awake for three nights straight.
- I don't feel like going up the steps is a drag - I feel like the steps are so steep I will need a pulley to help me.
The thing is with this fatigue is that when you tell people without MS you feel tired, people without MS relate it to when they feel tired... but is it SO different.
In fact it is so different that I am getting too tired to explain any more.